Thursday, 24 October 2013

gym fart

Everyone knows the dancefloor fart. Packed club, shoulder rubbing with strangers, broken beer glasses. And the fart. As obvious to the night club experience as the vomiting just outside the club and two large big mac meals afterwards.

With this prologue, let me introduce the gym fart. Gym fart is a part of the group exercise class just like the dancefloor fart is a part of the night club. Except that: it's worse. A lot worse. What makes it worse, is that the gym floor isn't as packed. There's less people. And they're completely sober. This makes it easy to locate the fart.

For every gym farter out there (Some bodies were just made to be fat, and healthy food doesn't do good for your stomach) try Rose Jam shower gele from LUSH cosmetics. Makes your sweat smell like roses. Motivates you to sweat really hard, so that in case you fart, no one will notice.

Gym fart is not to be confused with the yoga fart. Yoga fart is a long, loud, pure fart produced by an old women trying to reach full relaxation.

Saturday, 5 October 2013

You know you're fat when..

3. You start studying film at uni. Just so you could one day make the superhero film you've always wanted to. Titled Felicia Fish fingers.

2. You like the fb page 'Fitspiration'. And you spend all your time liking their pics and statuses. When you could be out running for example.

1. You start taking Italian lessons. So that you could one day move there. Not because of the nice weather or beutiful men, but the endless amount of carbs that place has to offer.

the only word I can so far is gelato. quattro stagione I knew from before, it's number 4 on the menu of my local pizza place.

get skinny x