Monday, 7 May 2012

The way my bootie goes.

My contribution to this blog has a simular to my love life.

My lack of love has given me the time i needed to look back on old photos of me. Bad move when you've done nothing but gain weight the last few years. I can no longer use the excuse, 'im big boned' because i've seen the photos of when i had a waist.

Tilt your screen forward, I promise you can see an arse outline.
And below, I actually have cheekbones. Groundbreaking.

Well anyway, being single and fat has been a struggle recently. Last month i was so strong, i even said to Sandra, 'I think i could wait until im at least twenty-five before i even need a man.' WELL THAT CHANGED.

Im struggling.

Im starting to take steps to become an eligible bachelor.
Firstly, stopped buying my underwear from Tescos. Instead I've upgraded to the David Beckham for H&M undies. You know you've done a good job when a fat person says your underwear is comfortable.
But I could do without the giant silver statues of David Beckham, they are making me even more self-conscious.

Although shopping in H&M has its down sides. When putting a XL hoody on the counter and the cashier treats it like a bed sheet when folding it. Took him three attempts before he could correctly fold the 'metres' of fabric.
The most awkward three minutes of my life.

But yeh, I had a moment thinking it would be possible to be fat and have a boyfriend. But discovered it only applies in extreme cases. Every.effort.backfires. Weight lost is the only way and the DC-Diet is your guide.

Get Skinny xx becauseallyoureffotsareworthless

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