Saturday, 7 January 2012

If you're bored of boobs, you're bored of life

Anyone ever wondered why I study shoe design? Cause clothes don't fit me! Shoes fit everyone(now that's a lie, read the post below)! Shoes fit perfectly even after Christmas!

Though, if I had boobs, I would probably study lingerie. The feeling of mentally breaking down, when finding the most perfect bra section and remembering that you don't have boobs, is far worse than mentally breaking down in the fitting room when findng the last most perfect sequin playsuit on the rail. In a size 10. And the highest you can get it is just below your knees. Even Flick has bigger boobs than me!

Do not get your nipples pierced only because you'd like bigger boobs, they do not swell up! Can you work out boob mucles? Will my boobs look bigger if I lost weight? Or will they dissapear completely? Why when I've gained weight, have I gained it in every part of my body EXCEPT my boobs? Is getting pregnant the only way to get big boobs? But getting pregnant means becoming fat too? And you need to be constantly pregnant to keep your big boobs don't you? Will they even look big when you're fat aswell? Does being pregnant get me one step closer of becoming Beyonce? And Kelly Rowland did have a boob job, didn't she?

So many questions. So much food to comfort me.

Get skinny......yeah right.

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